Calling All Aerosol Cans and Grab the Freon!!
Global cooling is on the rise! According to those who follow the weather, we are having record-breaking temperatures, but not those that give warmth. According to this article from Daily Tech, China has had its coldest winter in 100 years, and did you see those people dancing in the first snow they ever saw in Baghdad? North America has not seen this much snow in 50 years and some states are getting more snow than ever recorded.
If that isn't enough for you, the article starts a long list, and doesn't finish it, of cities and areas around the world that are experiencing record cold temperatures and accumulation of ice! All this begs the questions of What if the humans cut out freon too much too soon? Do we need to openly discharge all those unused aerosol cans under your sink? How many trees do we need to cut down to bring back that global warming!? Are condo prices going back up in Florida?
I need serious answers from those Global Warmists! Where is Al Gore? Will he produce "An Inconvienient Group (of Snowballs)"? Can his mansion in Nashville go back to the anti-green light bulbs, now!!? I'm starting to worry about the nursery industry and their zone maps that tell me I can grow my peach tree here!
Now for the really and truly serious question: Who pays all the bozos to work up the public into global climate frenzies? That money needs to be funneled to our household. I tend to do a better job predicting all this global weather than they do, and I'll tell you my secret on how I do it, too. It is a simple science of going with my gut instinct and proclaiming aloud to my husband the exact opposite of what the "experts" just stated. So far, I've beaten them on the hurricane calls two years in a row.
So, relax, global-warmists, the polar bears are going to be just fine... except the fish they eat might be freezing. Perhaps I should start a fund for that problem before someone else does in case the polar bears' fish swim south. Anybody in?
If that isn't enough for you, the article starts a long list, and doesn't finish it, of cities and areas around the world that are experiencing record cold temperatures and accumulation of ice! All this begs the questions of What if the humans cut out freon too much too soon? Do we need to openly discharge all those unused aerosol cans under your sink? How many trees do we need to cut down to bring back that global warming!? Are condo prices going back up in Florida?
I need serious answers from those Global Warmists! Where is Al Gore? Will he produce "An Inconvienient Group (of Snowballs)"? Can his mansion in Nashville go back to the anti-green light bulbs, now!!? I'm starting to worry about the nursery industry and their zone maps that tell me I can grow my peach tree here!
Now for the really and truly serious question: Who pays all the bozos to work up the public into global climate frenzies? That money needs to be funneled to our household. I tend to do a better job predicting all this global weather than they do, and I'll tell you my secret on how I do it, too. It is a simple science of going with my gut instinct and proclaiming aloud to my husband the exact opposite of what the "experts" just stated. So far, I've beaten them on the hurricane calls two years in a row.
So, relax, global-warmists, the polar bears are going to be just fine... except the fish they eat might be freezing. Perhaps I should start a fund for that problem before someone else does in case the polar bears' fish swim south. Anybody in?
posted by Andrea at
9:27 PM
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